Rejection

Ok, we'll start with the basics.

I didn't get the job. I got a polite email telling me they weren't taking my application forward. I know the job world is filled with nonsense phrases, but that one really is a nonsense. At least I will know next time not to blog about it. Or wear my Superman pants to an interview again: they clearly aren't lucky.

The worst thing is that, althought the job wasn't the most perfect for me, I had started to accentuate the positives to myself. Mostly these were a considerably shorter and cheaper commute (albeit that I still didn't know the salary so I didn't know if 'cheaper' would still be 'cheaper' inthe long run) and not having to work with my current team any more. There were other benefits: more focused work which would look better on my c.v. and a closer step towards onebof the end jobs which I may want, but I really just was getting frustrated in the place I am in and wanted any job, not specifically this one.

Although not getting the job seemed a huge blow at the time - mostly because I had exaggerated to myself my performance in the interview as being amazing when I probably came across as an over-excited, under-experienced chancer - what it has done is galvanise my efforts to avail myself of alternative employment as soon as reasonably possible.

Possibly one of the slightly more gutting aspects is that I had put off a few bits and bobs in the hope that, had I been offered the job, I wouldn't have had to do them. Things like replying to meeting invites, providing my input or feedback on projects, stuff like that. Now I have to get back to the frame of mind of a committed member of the team, or at least hold out that façade until the next interview.

I knew from the start it was never going to be a good day. I woke slightly late. Correction: I woke on time, I got out of bed 5 minutes later than in compliance with my routine, despite knowing that I could not forego a shave that day. On occasions, if I am running late (or just simply looking rugged enough) the shave is one of the elements of my routine which can be excised. That and breakfast.

So I got up late. I still left the house on time and got to work on time, but there was only one other member of the team in today. I like having more of the team in because it reduces the effort I have to spend on conversation considerably. Also the member of the team in today was my least favourite: a bit snobby, very much considers himself better than everyone else. Which he isn't. So it wasn't a surprise to get the rejection on top of a day already stacking against me.

Then, on opening the inbox, there were already 5 pieces of work in there. Bearing in mind that it is rare for there even to be one which is good because I like to ease myself into the day. Some people see it as 'lazy' but it isn't. It isn't that I don't do work, I just do other work tasks that my colleagues don't see as work. I am not lazy at work, not by any means. I actually go out of my way to set myself tasks to do, but these don't get seen by my team because they are for other teams or higher up in the business. But I excelled myself today and cleared the 5 very quickly.

And then I came down to London, one of the main highlights being the Friday night out which again has already suffered not one, but two setbacks as my friend had to work late; and someone particularly cute who I was hoping to see again (ok, snog again) has blown me off. And not in a good way.

Add to this the powernap. My friend always wants (nay needs, for he doesn't operate properly otherwise) a 'powernap'. This is a short sleep of up to 45 minutes. I, however, cannot sleep so spend that timebin a darkened room going slightly mad and yet, perversely, unable to get out of bed at the end. Hence why we are only just on a tube and it is not far shy of midnight.

And, because I was unable to nap, I will get tired early and we will have to return before 5am