So, how was it for you?

So, how was my jubilee weekend?

Well, you would think – with so many friends down in London – that I would be down there. And it is probably my greatest regret that I wasn't there. One of the greatest regrets of my time so far.

So, why wasn't I in London?

Well, I have many friends down in London, however they all had things organised. I was hindered somewhat by my three weeks abroad. These three weeks – though they were the most fantastically brilliant three weeks of my life and I would never refuse those – have caused many a hindrance. They mean that this year in the garden I am growing substantially less than before, either because I missed the sowing season, or because the ones I had sown died before I could pot them on. However more pertinently with regard to this weekend, it was those three weeks when everyone else made plans, and when the decent train tickets sold out.

There are other reasons as well. The friend that I usually stay with was up just last weekend for a weekend in Nottingham; and due to two training courses in London at the end of the month – each conveniently on a Friday allowing me to stay for the weekend – it means that I shall see all my various London friends over those two weekends. Even for me, three trips to London in a month is slightly excessive, not to mention expensive.

I would have loved to go up to Newcastle, but again my friends up there were pre-booked (although it later turns out that one was let down with little to do, though even less money to do it with, so it would have to have been a very economical weekend had we spent it with each other).

And with one thing and another I hadn't had a Nottingham weekend for a while and actually quite wanted to see family and friends.

So I was to go native, stay local.

But it was one of those weekends that was built up so greatly: there was so much expectation upon it – not just because it was a four day weekend; not just because it was a celebration; but because it was the Diamond Jubilee – a ONCE IN A LIFETIME occasion.

So, surely my mailbox was brimming with invitations? Surely I was having to turn people down, disappoint the many?

No.

And I'm not too sure exactly what happened really.

I stayed in on the Friday night. That was reasonably as expected. Even with a three-day weekend, people tend to forgo the Friday night in favour of enjoying nights on Saturday and Sunday – when they can relax and recover on the Monday; rather than overdoing it and burning out before the Sunday shinnigans. So I expected few to be out that night any way.

Saturday night was the football club 'end of season' drinks out in town. Few attended. Town was quiet.

There seems to have been a growing fracturing within the club and whereas once we had been a tight, integrated unit, regularly going out and inviting others out; this seems to have changed. It may just be the natural cyclical nature of groups – they grow too big to invite people out; they have disagreements or distractions and then, after a while, regroup and rebuild into a new organism. You see it in all groups, it is natural development – new people come in, other people leave and the dynamics within the group, the smaller sub-groups subtly shift and change the chemical composition ever so slightly, but with massively different effect.

But it was a very small group out. And like I say, town was quiet anyway. I don't know if there were so many other events planned that people already had plans, if so many people were hosting parties of their own; or maybe ennui had set in. We are in a recession, and Nottingham is in the provinces, and so people may have thought better than attending a celebration that is essentially on the extremity of the fingertip of the body of the whole.

Sunday I spent most of the day gardening and doing bits and bobs around the house. I did pop into town later on just because I can and to see what was happening and the answer was – again – nothing much.

Now, Monday I had made plans. I had created plans – I was organising a party.

Now, this was all a little bit last minute. I had been intending to do something for a while, and this weekend seemed to present the ultimate opportunity. I had courted opinions the weekend before at another party, and generally people seemed to be available and enthusiastic about it. But, in fairness, it wasn't until Wednesday lunchtime whilst shopping at the supermarket that I made the final decision.

And so I started shopping for it there and then – the non-perishables that would keep for the almost-a-week until the party. And that night I sent the invitation out electronically. I invited around 60-70 people. That's not a bad number because you know that not everyone would turn up. Now, admittedly if half turned up it might prove squeezing on the resources (well, the barbeque, in that it isn't made for that many people) but I could always get enough food that number of people one way or another.

But I needed to know.

And by the next shopping trip on Friday I only had 6 acceptances – mostly family. I only had a couple of rejections – all the others were 'pending'.

Now, that simply isn't workable. I don't know if I'm catering for 6 or 60 people. And there is a massive difference in the food requirements between them! Some of the stuff is fine – crisps, for example, I can get through in the months and months of their lifespan. But the fresh stuff I really have to have a decent idea how many I am catering for. Having said that, a single lettuce at a barbeque will still more than enough for 60 people. No-one has salad at a barbeque.

Oh, but I did have to buy a quiche. Just in case there were vegetarians. You can't barbeque a lettuce. I've tried.

And that's probably what frustrated me the most. Not whether or not people turned up, but the fact that pretty much 90% of the invitees didn't have the courtesy even to decline where they knew they weren't going to be able to make it.

So I had absolutely no idea until the day how many people were going to turn up. In the end most of them didn't. It was the family and my best mate. So actually a really nice gathering, and one which my barbeque could adequately cater for.

And it was actually a really nice occasion. It was lovely to do something for the family and my best mate. It's been ages since I've had the family round for a meal – in fact it may only have happened once before whilst my brother has hosted many times. And I do like my best mate.

And then me and my sister went out and got drunk. Which was good.

But, when you are faced with constant adversity you have to celebrate any little successes. And when built up to a critical zenith, you can only look down, return to earth at a pace.